I was sitting at a traffic light the other day behind a nondescript white car. The car was a typical family-mobile with a popular license plate for these parts. I have seen it numerous times around town and around the state. The license plate was one of the "cause based" plates that the department of transportation offers. They offer plates, among others, to support wildlife or your favorite college or in this case to "Choose Life". Now who could be against that? It's such a simple idea so based in truth. When death stalks us in so many expected and unexpected ways from heart attacks to tsunamis, who in his right mind would choose death? I get it you know. I know why someone feels the way they do about abortion. I feel it too. Apologies to the United States Supreme Court but there is no scientific way anyone will ever convince me of the simple fact that if you did nothing, the unborn fetus would live on and become a human being. So that makes choosing life simple, right? Well not in the complex world I see around me, nothing is ever that simple.
First and foremost the question is begged, what happens if you change the status quo, the way things are now? If we re-criminalize abortion it will stop, right? No one will ever do it any more because they will face jail time. That will stop it, that will show them, right? I don't know but I hope that scenario doesn't play out. The return to "back-alley" amateur procedures is about as barbaric a thought as I could conjure. The simple fact is that people will practice abortion as long as there are people. They always have and always will. Statutory responses that criminalize are not likely to do any more than polarize our country more as people resist the enactment of the new laws. We need MORE polarization? Surely not. I see a few other paths out of this "all or nothing at all" wilderness. We have to admit that each of us isn't going to get just everything we want and in America that is going to be the most nearly impossible task. We want what we want. These days we want others to believe EXACTLY like we do. The idea that a plurality of opinion is somehow "flip-flopping" is the most dangerous force we have loose in the country today. When there is no room for variety and "it's my way or the highway" is the rule, there will be no evolution of thought but simply revolution as the oppressed opinion rebels. Why are conservatives winning the land now? Simple, when the liberals ruled the day they gave no quarter to conservatives and the cycle of resistance was built. It reached a point that when conservatives got a chance to return to power they now didn't just have a few needs to be met but they had an AGENDA to ENACT. Oh by the way, that's why the liberals were so nasty before as well. The conservative era before the liberal era gave liberals no place at the table and the current cycle was set into motion.
So where do we go then that will allow everyone a place at the table in this current debate. First, let's start by admitting that the language we have been using is flawed. It has never been about "a woman's right to choose' or "abortion on demand". Both of those catch phrases just hit everyone's hot buttons and the debate instantly becomes a shouting match. Let's admit one central truth, you don't even have to admit it out loud if you feel it will compromise your principles but accept it into your heart. Abortion will kill an otherwise viable fetus and that fetus would have been a human being. Sorry but whether one wants to admit it or not that is centrally, continually and undeniably true. Having said that, let's give the other side a point. If you bring an unwanted child into the world you aren't doing it too many favors. The chances for poverty and abuse rise exponentially in that scenario. So that means abortion should be allowed? Well, not on the basis of the phrase "a woman's right to choose". The opponents have it right when they say, but no one is asking the other life involved. If you buy the central fact of fetal/human viability the woman's choice seems pretty callous and selfish. So let's go back to that other chestnut "abortion on demand". This is just as flawed. It implies that women are wandering down to the abortion clinic with no more thought than ordering a burger at a fast food restaurant. I have known women struggling with the option of abortion and while I'll suggest that there may be some women indeed who do it lightly, the one's I've known have been painfully wrenched by the ramifications of the options.
So do we just sit here in this unhappy conundrum of shrill shouting and let one side or the other "win" the debate. The problem with that approach is that in this debate no one wins. When you must WIN you make your opponent resist you more because they quite rightly perceive that they have a great deal to loose by staying on the sidelines. If the pro-abortion side lets the anti-abortion side know that it in fact cares about the lives lost to abortion and wants to do the right thing then maybe the anti folks would not see the stakes being so dire. What's the "right thing" I'm talking about here? If indeed it is about woman's choices let's do all we can to both 1) make sure she knows what ALL her choices are and 2) let's give her more of them. The two of these things can only be accomplished if we take on a "put your money where your mouth is" approach to this dilemma.
First, the one place I agree with the "anti" folks completely is that waiting periods and counseling should be mandatory for this particular procedure. The emotions involved and the stakes involved are so high. Let's make sure that the mother knows ALL of her options other than disposal. If you want to make law this one makes sense and is not likely to lead to the possibility of jail time for a moral decision. Let's use the laws here like we do to restrict how people drive their cars. We don't question being told that if you want to drive 200MPH you better have number on your car and be going in a circle. Same could be true in this case. The behavior you want to pursue is dangerous to others, be sure that you do it only under controlled conditions.
That quickly brings one to the next problem. A person considering this option frequently has a limited number of options. It is the likely reason that the person even thought to explore abortion in the first place. Do you believe that the fetus should be allowed to live? Guess what, that is going to cost someone in real money, real time, lost opportunities or all three. One could say that the person should have been more responsible or some other judgmental comment. This doesn't wash. Truly without thinking too hard we can all think of a great number of "accidental births" where all the precautions were taken and motherhood resulted. So do we fall back on judgmental acrimony or do we try to help the mother make the "right" choice. Instead of paying lawyers to try to put the clinics out of business, put your money into a "support mothers who put there children up for adoption" fund. Instead of spending your time picketing and lobbying offer your financial assistance or our governmental assistance to mothers making the "right" choice. Instead of spending your dollars to support someone in jail for years on end, spend them to support the mother during and after the pregnancy. Both could be for a period of years but which approach is more humane or dare I say more Christian? For that matter which one would be more cost effective? If we supplemented a woman with $10,000 a year for child support wouldn't that be better than spending $30,000 per year for both her and her doctor to be holed up in prison.
What I offer here is a place. It is a place in the middle. That means that both "sides" will find some way to pick at these words. It won't make any of us happy. Maybe it will do something else though. Maybe it will make us all a little less angry. Maybe it will allow us to be a little more civil to one another as we discuss this intractable problem. Most importantly, take this course and LESS BABIES WILL BE KILLED. Is that worth a little personal pride about being RIGHT? I urge you to put down your opinions and REALLY "Choose Life". Don't just wear it on your car, live it in your life.
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